you have received nothing but the best advice and i hope you take it to heart... keep in mind something VERY important... whatever misconception you have about steroids, you need to drop it completely out of your thoughts bro... steroids are not to be used when your very undersized, when you have a "fucked up" diet, when your not in top condition etc... all your going to do is destroy yourself all the way around... you have no idea what you would be getting into but it would not end up pleasant for you... really take in what was advised, read the thread provided, study it, ask more diet related questions and get the guidance you need to do this the right and safe way... that's what we are here for... don't hesitate to just ask...