Hi, everybody, as the title states, I'm ibleedoranbla. Many here know me and I'm sure they're a lot of new members that don't. I haven't been on the board in about 2 months because of some personal obstacles that have been thrown my way. I have been out of the gym for the last two months due to a pretty bad injury. I'm not really sure what happened but I messed my shoulder up really bad. Two weeks before Thanksgiving I was moving a new couch into my house and this is when I got an intense pain in my right shoulder. It was so bad I dropped the couch and couldn't hardly lift my arm up. I don't think I injured it while moving the couch but I think that is what brought the injury to my attention. The next couple days I rested it and attempted to go to the gym and I basically couldn't perform any exercises due to the pain. It was at this moment that I realized I was going to have to hang it up for awhile. Over the following 6 weeks the pain was so bad that I could barely even lift my arm up in the shower to wash myself. I should have went to the doctor but I didn't because I'm stubborn. I even attempted to go to the gym and just do squats and I couldn't even get my arms up to unrack the bar. During this time, I lost a very close friend to my family unexpectedly. My fiancee and I also went through a rough patch with each other and with all of this culminating together, I went into a downward spiral like a weakling. I began to drink excessively and basically lost all my desire to ever lift again. Last week I decided to put an end to my self pity and get my shit back together. I'm not going to make excuses for myself, it is what it is. I fell and I fell hard. I have a wedding that I need to get ready for in April and I plan on hitting it hard. My shoulder is no longer in pain, it stopped hurting around a week ago. I still have no clue what I did to it. I worked out tonight for the first time in two months and it felt great. I felt an immense desire within myself to be the alpha at my gym once again. I have put on some weight that I'm not proud of and my only goal at this point is to shred that off. I experienced no pain in my shoulder tonight while lifting but I did notice that my right shoulder is significantly weaker than my left. I plan to take the weights easy for the first month because I'm so afraid of injuring my shoulder again. Like I said, my only goal is to shred down anyway. All I've ever really focused on in my life is being as big and strong as possible, so this will be a new journey for me. I was given some bottles of SR9009 by Pure Essence a couple of months ago to do a log on and I fully plan on utilizing those bottles and sticking to my word on doing a log. I apologize to everyone of my friends on here for just vanishing but deep down inside I just did not feel right being on here and posting. I felt that if I'm not walking the walk then I had no business talking the talk. Thanks to all for taking the time to read this novel.